harvestful

2-week final update!

- August 9 -

Hi Everyone, After a few weeks of being back in the states, I had some time to adjust back to life here and think about everything that happened in China.  There are some significant lessons that God has taught my team and me there that I hope I can hold on to and apply to my life here.  Things have already begun to be crazy and hectic back in New York, but by His grace, He is still present in my life and showing me that I need to remain in Him.  Here are some things that I’ve learned that I hope will be applicable to you as well! 

‘Missionary’ is not a job title, but a lifestyleAll the missionaries in China will agree that what they do, is nothing different from what people can do anywhere.  They live their life doing their jobs the best they can and loving people.  “The only difference,” one Missionary said to us, “is that God told us to do all that here instead of over there.  Missions work is just being faithful, but at a different geographical location.”  This is a major paradigm shift for me since I tend to super-spiritualize missionaries and see the mission field as an almost mystified heightened place of spirituality.  But if God is the God of all, and He calls ALL to His Great Commission, I can still have that sense of purpose no matter where I am. 

Denying of self to see more of HimMy team and I struggled the first week when we were there.  It was hard to get over the physical uncomfortableness and the cultural difference.   In some way, it was good to be uncomfortable because especially as Young adult New Yorkers, we are not used to being uncomfortable.  We have every sort of physical and worldly comfort accessible to us.  Some of us were thinking how much greater their lives would be if only they had the comforts of America.  But later on, we saw that it really wasn’t that we needed any of these physical things, it was our heart condition.  It was difficult to see God and what He was doing there because we were so focused on ourselves.   It was truly by His gracious hand that He introduced us to people who shared Truth to us about what life is REALLY about, and it has nothing to do with warm water and clean toilets! Some people think that self-denial is a lost, masochistic practice.  But I can testify that God was truly purifying our hearts when we were less focused on ourselves and focused  more on things of Him.  When it says, “you must deny yourselves and take up your cross and follow me,” it is not just a command but a necessity in order to purify our hearts to do the things He has called us to do.  It made me think about my life in America and how lost I get in being so self-sufficient, and so physically comfortable that I lose my sense of the need for God and how He can move.  As one of the pastors said during the Sunday service, “God works like the wind: we don’t see the wind, but we see the affects of the wind.”  God is working in America very mightily, but maybe its hard for me to see because I am so focused on myself and on worldly comforts.   

Spiritual Battle is realWhenever we see more of God, resistence follows.  By His grace, towards the second week of our trip, God was really moving our hearts and helping us to stop focusing on ourselves.  But shortly after, almost all of our team members started to get sick, and some other things were happening that was causing division among the people that were there.  In the effort of seeing the world with spiritual eyes, one of the other realities is also seeing that spiritual battle is everywhere.  Things like sickness, dissension among the believers, and physical struggles were just some things we experienced and saw within the campus.  Although there is a part that we need to fight, I also had to understand that spiritual battle is all around.  Coming back home, sometimes it can feel overwhelming and hopeless because it seems like I’m failing time and time again to live a life that is pleasing to Him.  But I need to keep believing that He is stronger than all of that and He will help us and not forsake us.   

Future ApplicationsOverall, I am trying to learn how to see my home as a mission field.  I am trying to understand my place in New York and how I can be connected to the community.  As a teacher, I am still learning and struggling to have a ministry perspective with my students and learn to love them.  Also, I felt confirmed that I am not called to full-time ministry, but rather, called to be a sender/mobilizer to connect people to the mission field.  I am continuing to learn about missions and trying to support those who are going overseas fulltime.  I am also trying to serve my church faithfully and help foster a mission-minded culture.   Thank you again so much for all your support and prayers.  I really felt encouraged by all of you, and I felt like we were partnering together.  I hope you will keep me updated in your lives and I hope to support you too somehow in the future. 

Thank you again!! 

Love,Linda :)